Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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