My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
