Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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