I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
