So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
40s are totally the cure
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
