just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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