i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize