The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
