Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
