We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
