My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
