he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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