The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize