Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
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