I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
