Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
