I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
