Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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