True but thats because hes a fetus.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
