I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
