Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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