i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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