dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Your penis caused this!
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