i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
