She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize
