There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize