adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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