apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
