Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Randomize
