I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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