how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
