haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
