my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
it glows. i had to have it.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize