So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
