I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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