That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
People in love make me want to vomit
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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