nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
so let's talk penis.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
