you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
