Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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