Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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