But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
