another moral hangover. fuck.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
We are all done wearing pants today
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize