He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Randomize
