You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
