All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
only you would photoshop your dick
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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