i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
