Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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