hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
her vagine was all disorganized.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
