the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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