We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize