didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
