i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I just had sex on a roof
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
