So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
